Man Up

Man Up- By Jontae’ Grace


It is difficult to find solutions to societal problems because so many factors are interrelated. So when I read a statistic that nearly seventy percent of Black children are now born to single mothers, I immediately wondered what conditions were responsible for it. The usual suspects come to mind: prison, street life, and the cycle of poverty. But how many of our problems are self-inflicted, and how do we know the difference between “doing what we gotta do,” and doing what we need to do? My brothers, it’s time to Man Up.

The black family is one arena where we can directly impact our quality of life, and shape young black minds. Sadly, many men have shunned their parental responsibilities to their women and their children, leaving our women to raise our kids with no financial support or moral guidance. The fact that many black men of our generation didn’t have fathers in their households is NO excuse for running out on our responsibilities. If anything, it should motivate us to be stand-up men and break the cycle that plagues our families. Our black women are strong, but there are some things that we need fathers to be present for. Black men can speak firsthand about the dangers of negative influences, the responsibility that comes with manhood, and the pleasures of honest money and upright living. It is difficult to learn true concepts of manhood when there is no viable example to pattern ourselves after, but we can learn about successful black men who raised families and exemplified masculinity. You can YouTube speeches of Malcolm X speaking about manhood, or read his Autobiography. Will Smith has spoken on the importance of the black father in the household also. And closer to home, there is always a male pastor who can be counted on for guidance, and many churches have men’s meetings outside of regular church hours. If you seek wisdom, she will be found by you. We males need to be willing to stand up in the midst of trials and tribulations, knowing that God is testing us to make us stronger, not to break us. The Bible tells us that suffering produces perseverance, and perseverance produces character.

One problem with our notions of manhood is that many of us care too much about how we are viewed by others. Instead of valuing things like education and stable employment, we have a flamboyant popular culture that places much emphasis on “now” money, however it may be earned. Many of us would rather be acknowledged as pilots of candy-painted spaceships than owners of 401k’s, stock options and money market accounts. Part of our tendency to stunt and flash is rooted in the past, when black people were subjected to public humiliation and degradation. For example, in the 1920’s in Charleston, South Carolina, white residents created a law that made it illegal for African-Americans to purchase and wear “silks, satins, crapes, lace, muslins, and such costly stuffs, [that are] looked upon and considered the luxury of dress.” This was designed to make “every distinction…between the whites and the negroes, calculated to make the latter feel the superiority of the former.” During World War Two, the federal government issued an executive law prohibiting the manufacturing, sale, and wearing of loud, oversized zoot suits. It was clear that our attempts to define ourselves through dress and public displays of wealth were fiercely opposed, and this is why we dress and finesse the way we do- because it is a celebration of our tastes and cultures, an affirmation of our personal freedoms, and enjoyment of the fruits of our labor.

But nowadays, we have taken stunting to a new level-for better or worse. The temptations of wealth have lured many of us into unjust gain. The only investments and returns that many inner-city males know is into the lucrative drug trade. One of the intellectuals from O-State University, Marques O’Neal Alexander, talks extensively about the importance of putting our dollars to work for ourselves in real estate, black investments and black ownership. We can still have jewels and furs, but they shouldn’t be our total focus. I am not saying that we shouldn’t strive to have nice things, but we should at least build financial stability before splurging on eye-catching, value-depreciating items. Black buying power is real, and if we used our money to better our communities, we can start to change the quality of life in Black America. Now excuse me while I check my balance.

Be Blessed,

Grace